Cook on repeat..

What is it about David Cook that makes me wanna come back again and again and listen to his songs ? Watching him on American Idol Season 7 was not like watching any other season of American Idol.According to me he is one of the best rockers I have listened to in my lifetime.But I have not been taken in by anyone's talent as Cook's.I think the reason why I wanna listen to Cook recursively is because he is so believable.Rockers generally have this air of surreality in their lifestyle and antics that almost lead you to believe that they are a different species from a different planet.No wonder they are demi-gods. But Cook is like any other regular guy but oh how extraordinary when it comes to talent.He is one of the best discovery of the decade.I loved his version of Billie Jean , Hello , Little Sparrow , I still haven't found what I am looking for etc.If you are snowed in like I am today , he is definitely worth your time.I am sure you would agree.Check him out.Enjoy.

~A, smitten by talent..as always

These are some of the things I noticed..

No one's a hero until he is wronged.
You live for the fight when its all you have got.
We are fascinated with and intrigued by handsome/beautiful troubled people.
You have to pay a price for every good you get in life.Nothing comes for free.Point is if you are willing to pay that price ?
Life is nor fair.Deal with it.Stop hoping for happy coincidences.
You wish you were a little taller , a little thinner and a little more assertive.
Till you achieve it , its big.Once you are there , you might tend to underplay your achievement.
Romance can start in the weirdest of places.
Rockers in suits have undeniable appeal.
Nobody gets rid of past baggage entirely.What matters is how much you check in to the next phase of your life.
Being optimistically pessimistic keeps you grounded.
Cliched but you can always choose who you want to be.There is always a choice and its upto you.
Men and women will always play games.
Most of the times it is not about winning but sure is about living upto it.
When you are traveling alone there will always be flight delays.
Nothing works better than sinful high calorie food when you are feeling blue.
Your parents think you are the most beautiful kid ever.
If Monday were a person , I would really feel bad for him.An object of so many's dislike without actually doing anything .
There is no right way or wrong way.Its only about doing the right thing.How you do it is again a matter of choice.
To make dreams come true you have to believe you deserve it.
How people perceive you is how you project yourself.So its best if you are the most confident and happy person to be around.Always works.
Humility and niceness never go out of fashion.
Life always gives you chances.Grab.


~A,a snow day can lead you to think in so many tangents...

Its thanksgiving and I am thankful for..

I had the most amazing thanksgiving holiday.And I am so grateful to god for giving me the life I have today.Like always , like always I say that its not at all the perfect life u would envision for yourself , but its perfect for me.After all , who knows what's perfect ?
Its thanksgiving and I am so thankful to god for giving me the perfect parents , who have believed in me and supported me all throughout my life.To quote a favorite author of mine , they have given me the wings of an Airbus-380.
Thankful for an elder sister who did all the right things and my parents were never too disappointed in me.
Thankful for sisters who are more than cousins & are like blessings showered in abundance & who love me as I am.
Thankful for my friends who have been there for me all throughout my bad times and the good ones.
Thankful for friends in unexpected places.
Thankful for all the good & the bad experiences I have had.
Thankful for surviving an almost air crash when i was eight.
Thankful for the cutest baby niece one could have(no qualms that she treats me like her slave).
Thankful for the unexpected A , which ups my GPA.
Thankful for coming across an old Christmas song I had once loved; in 103.5 FM and now I am listening to it over & over again.
Thankful for the laundry in my basement.
Thankful for a Popeye's & Dunkin next to my apartment.
Thankful for a thanksgiving vacation where i visited 3 new places & met amazing people over turkey.
Thankful for people who still find my poor jokes funny(I am sure they do that just to humor me).
Thankful for seeing Roger Federer play live.(Would be thankful if I can see SRK in person.I hope someone up there is listening :D).
Thankful for having had the chance to climb the Eiffel Tower.
Thankful for non stop flights to India from Newark.
Thankful for months when the pseg bill is really low.
Thankful for days when its not awfully windy.
Thankful for the German technology called SAP.
Thankful for online streaming.
Thankful for psychedelic rock.
Thankful for eye candy boy bands.
Thankful for Black Friday sales.
Thankful for an invention called Google.
Thankful for being a Mac owner.
Thankful for facebook , youtube & headphones to help me attend classes with a poker face.
Thankful for friends who don't hate me even after I stop them mid-sentence to correct their English grammar.
Thankful for being in the garden state.
Thankful for cute guys in my office building.
Thankful for friends who don't hesitate to criticize me.
Thankful for having the maturity to realize what life is and yet float off to daydream about life with background music.
Thankful for having girlfriends who openly swoon over Edward Cullen in a movie theater.
Thankful for always having the humor to see the funny side in every tough situation.
Thankful for having quite an interesting 20-something life and still looking forward to many more.
Thankful for the people who stop by to read my blog & say they like it.

~A, still wondering if there z more ..

P.S.-The order of the list does not indicate the author's order of thankfulness.Its as random as her thoughts.

Current iMe..

I obsess over things over short spans of time.My current ones are -

1. "Its murder on the dance floor..You better not kill the groove" ..Sophie Ellis Bextor.
2.Pls Pls God let it be what I want it to be...
3.Have to have to figure out the work stuff..have to..have to..want to ..want to...on my own.Hate giving up.
4.How I met your mother.
5.The twilight saga : New Moon...Ah Edward Cullen..
6.The book of love..Peter Gabriel..
7.Roger Federer (perennial now i guess ).If humility had a face it would be him.
8.Tea , tea and more Assam tea..
9.Nothing in this world that’s worth having comes easy..
10.Strength & sanity despite all odds...I know I will..



~A , after all things that didn't break you made you...

The wai......t for that moment of inspiration..

So it's 3:42 am , Friday morning.Why did I stay awake so late ?Waiting for a moment of inspiration.Yea there are days like that when you just can't go to sleep like just another day.What did I do ? "The gun in Betty Lou's handbag".That's the first name that popped up in my insomniac mind.Believe me I am not a gun nut or something.But it just popped up in my head.Maybe this is what happens when there are no more movies to watch anymore and you try to find that random movie you watched like eons ago.Life does come a full circle.I searched and searched on the world wide web.A binary search , a quicksort , a bubblesort ...naah..I am just trying to show off the algorithms i learned in school.All I did was a random search on my favorite search engine- Google !And no results.No free online print.However I did see another name which caught my fancy - "Julie & Julia".I had been meaning to watch that for sometime now but never happened.And since M.Streep and Amy Adams starred in it , it was immediately an iLike(too much Facebook does this to you !!).And as the movie progressed i realized that I knew Julie Powell already.She was in my blog about 3 years back.Even though the movie was about her love for Julia Child and her Cordon Bleu cooking , I loved the fact that Julie had the commitment to actually go through it for a year and jot down her experiences.Kudos to that !!
I love writing , yet I hardly come back to my blog often to write something interesting.Julie I admire you for the work you have done.You are my blog idol.You are the first on my blogroll list.
But coming back to the point where I began.Looking for an inspiration.The gun in Betty Lou's handbag & Julie and Julia has something in common.You do what you didn't expect.You pleasantly surprise yourself.You break the shackles of the regular.And maybe that's what I was looking for.I found my inspiration and its 4:00 am.I gotta go to work early , submit an assignment , do laundry and grocery and blah..blah..blah..
I hope I am not too tired to turn my inspiration into something worthwhile(most of the time I am).

~A,inspired ..just that the time is wrong...

Whatever happened or did not happen was for a reason.And I believe it is always for a good reason.No regrets.

~A , happy to look back...

Excerpts from "Garden State"...
Andrew Largeman: You know that point in your life when you realize the house you grew up in isn't really your home anymore? All of a sudden even though you have some place where you put your shit, that idea of home is gone.
Sam: I still feel at home in my house.
Andrew Largeman: You'll see one day when you move out it just sort of happens one day and it's gone. You feel like you can never get it back. It's like you feel homesick for a place that doesn't even exist. Maybe it's like this rite of passage, you know. You won't ever have this feeling again until you create a new idea of home for yourself, you know, for your kids, for the family you start, it's like a cycle or something. I don't know, but I miss the idea of it, you know. Maybe that's all family really is. A group of people that miss the same imaginary place.

Can the cynic be on vacation for a day ?

Yesterday I saw the movie "Wake Up Sid".Indian Cinema coming of age I should say.Younger guy falling in love with an older woman and things actually working out in the end.

My friend CD and I are cynics.As we watched the movie together , ideally the situation should have been "This cannot work out".However for whatever cosmic karma I was feeling more like "Love comes to those who believe","Love knows no reason" (had chanced upon some Celine Dion songs the day before.Totally blame it on her !!)and I was glad that things actually worked out in the end.CD was grossly disappointed in me more than with the movie.She was like "You will return to the cynics club just like the prodigal son.You will.You will !!"

And trust me I did.The next morning I was back to analyzing and dissecting the movie.

Reel bite 1 : Girl's First day in Mumbai.Meets a great guy .Luck by chance.

Reality bite 1 : Happens with my girlfriends(It actually did ! And they are happily married :)).Never happens to me.

Reel bite 2 : You have an exotic name as Aish Banerjee.

Reality bite 2 : When you have a name as long as Abhilasha then people waste no time in shortening it to Abhi (which is more paly than anything exotic) and if you have a common surname as Sharma , you are as exotic as a wallflower.Bachan senior played so many roles as Vijay Sharma in the '70s that people are yet to recover from that hangover.

Reel bite 3 : Your boss is handsome and takes you to jazz clubs.

Reality bite 3 : That's true.Your boss is handsome.He takes his amazingly pretty girlfriend for all that jazz.And that hot girlfriend has a golden heart too ! Talk about cosmic cruelty !!

Reel bite 4 : Your boyfriend and his friends help you set up your new home and have amazing fun splashing colors on your walls.

Reality bite 4 : Any boyfriend you have (by that I mean any guy who is even your friend) find the most amazing places to hide and not help when it comes to relocating and setting up a new home.They are so lazy !! But are prompt to demand a house warming party.Just my luck I guess.

Reel bite 5: You don't have any skills yet you get hired for your hobby.

Reality bite 5: You work like a dog , juggle 2-3 interviews a day , get tortured by the HR of different companies who are trying to psychoanalyze you (mostly I think by the way they stare they are trying to figure out if you had appeared in America's Most Wanted) and then come home and try to resolve numerous issues.By the end of that you are half dead on your feet and brain to even remember your name , forget about hobby.

Reel bite 6 : Your internship turns into FT.

Reality bite 6 : Gimme a break !!

Reel bite 7 : Your mom loves the girl you are living with and totally believes you both are sharing a platonic relationship.She almost blesses you for taking in her son.

Reality bite 7 : If I were to live in with someone , my parents would disown me.And my dad would end the drama by saying - "I always knew you are the black sheep of the family".I always knew too.He told me a zillion times before , that's how.

Reel bite 8 : Guy is 7 yrs younger to you.Love finds a way and things work out.

Reality bite 8 : Guy gets petrified and takes the nearest fire exit out of the situation even though he is a minute younger to you.Nothing works out.He deletes you from his friends' list in Facebook(that's a big sentimental issue for most of our generation's folks !)

I could go on and on , the cynical me but somehow inspite of everything I liked the movie.Maybe I need to have the bar mitzvah of the cynics soon.Any cynic listening ?

~A , love the cynical me , such a lovely place to be ..

Is this nirvana ?

Arrogance or peace?

~A, is she beyond everything or everything beyond her?

"Maybe God has a bigger plan for me than I ever had for myself"

Mixed Feelings..

I am back from a long trip from home.Yet strangely I don't know what to feel.I am thrilled I met my parents and all my

loved near and dear ones.I am sad I had to leave them and come back to a place where I live alone.Yet I tell

no one what I am feeling deep inside.I do not have tears as i change airports after airports saying farewell

to the ones who care.I wonder what they think ? And I wonder what am i feeling ?Why do i fear to feel ?

Why can't I live in the moment for once and give into my feelings ? I know it makes me no more weaker or stronger

than I already am if I show what I feel.Yet I stop myself.I fear that any sign of weakness would plunge me

into a twisted spiral to the dark deep abyss of vulnerability.And I don't even want to start going to that place.So I stop

myself from feeling what I feel and I move on.But how long ? What if I break down ?Some people say either you are strong

or not.I say there are millions of times I have to be strong when I am not.

When I see my mother who stays thousands of miles away bidding me goodbye through the glass of the airport lounge with teary eyes without knowing when she will see me next.

How do you stop yourself from feeling anything when that long longtime friend of yours is shedding few silent tears

instead of giving you her sunny smile on her birthday as I leave?

How do you not feel anything when your 5 yr old niece who loves you so much just refuses to come out of the bearhug because

she can't bear that you are leaving?

How do you stop yourself to feel anything when someone who is not your mom says that she is so proud of you that she would want

a daughter like you instead of ten sons anyday and blesses you whole heartedly as you leave?

How do you feel saying goodbye to the two loving sisters who encourage you to be who you are and support you in your pursuit of dreams?

Yet I don't cry .I need to stay strong.But maybe I have been wrong.Maybe being strong is not about not showing your true feelings.

Maybe being able to cry those tears and yet trudging along like a Trojan soldier in the face of odds is what truly maketh you brave hearted.

Maybe its ok to show you care and say yes I feel the same.Maybe I can try and maybe one day I will be what strength is in the

true sense.Till then ...I will try...

~A, hopeful of the many maybe s...

My 90 calorie solace..

Yes this piece is every bit as its name suggests.Calories and solace.They look so made for each other and so right together in the same sentence.I have always been on the right side of the scale.And by right i mean literally right.The pointer moves more towards the right than the left side.Until the wakeup call in March , me food and calories were a happy family.But ever since I started being on a diet , we have been in an estranged relationship.The day I say to myself I am going on a diet from now on , the more hungrier I feel.I start getting more creative ideas about food.No less than chef Ramsay himself.Its almost like the calories begging for a second chance.Poor things had no idea about the sudden turn of events.And even though I was in love , I had to walk away.I needed space and they needed to understand.When you love you need to let go.If it comes back to you keep it.If not it was never yours in the first place.We didn't go to extremes.I realised I couldn't live wihtout the calories.I was in love after all.So we decided to meet each other halfway.No meal was more than 90 calories.But of course the enjoyment was more frequent.I have a feeling this is working out just fine for me and calories.I get to keep my love and love makes my skin shine.

Point to be noted : This piece might look random but it is a real heartfelt one.A true foodie might begin to understand.

~A, back in love

Lines which say it all in very few words..

In the name of honesty

In the name of what is fair

You answer all my questions

But never really answer my prayers

We have no secrets , Carly Simon

I have three good reasons to survive

One is eight and one will soon turn five

Third one is a woman who still has her pride

And that makes three good reasons to survive

Three good reasons , Crystal Gale

~A, loves confessional songs

A very arithmetical kind of love..

I fear that I will always be
A lonely number like root three
A three is all that's good and right
Why must my three keep out of sight
Beneath a vicious square root sign
I wish instead I were a nine
For nine could thwart this evil trick with just some quick arithmetic
I know I'll never see the sun, as 1.7321
Such is my reality, a sad irrationality
When hark! What is this I see
Another square root of a three
Has quietly come waltzing by
Together now we multiply
To form a number we prefer
Rejoicing as an integer
We break free from our mortal bonds
And with a wave of magic wands
Our square root signs become unglued
And love for me has been renewed.

~A, made me smile..from a movie

Is Roger the GOAT ?

So finally Roger Federer won the Roland Garros ! The much eluded grand slam title for a career that has spanned 10 professional years.But all is well that ends well.And I mean end only in the quest for a grand slam.The bloke looked all the more rejuvenated at the RG press conference and hungering for more now that he has joined the greats like Rod Laver , Roy Emerson in the Hall of Fame for winning all the Grand Slams and equaled Pete's GS titles of 14.There is no doubt that it is not a mean feat but all mortals have this nagging habit of speculation.Is he really the greatest of all times (GOAT) ? Even though Agassi , McEnroe have been open in their praise and acceptance of Roger definitely being one of the greatest , yet we speculate.What about Rafa ? True.I agree.Rafa has been Roger's nemesis for quite sometime.It has been more like Roger having the Nadal complex.Facing Rafa has been a mental block for the quiet and demure swiss.And Rafa is exactly the opposite of Fed in game and temperament.I totally agree with the speculation. People say he didn't beat the best ! Had Rafa been beaten in the finals , the king would have been crowned more willingly. But does it matter for now ? I think he has the cup in his kitty and 14 to his name and history written and that's what matters as of now.I know Rafa is currently the best.But will he be able to equal Rog's records ? He is already plagued by injuries and rumors are doing the rounds that he might pull out of Wimbledon 2009.Tennis is not just about the game.Its about fitness , temperament , poise and grace.And Roger embodies all.
The man's shyness does not escape you.An idiot tried to put a cap on him and a Barc flag on court during last Sunday's finals.He just shied away.The RG official website wrote a very interesting line- The idiot should have tried that on Marat Safin !! :D ...He wouldn't have escaped without a whack.But Roger just tried to pull away.He is a darling with the French crowd because of his game and grace.I loved Soderling's candid interview after the finals.The press asked him how did he feel about the match? He said -I say after every match played with Roger that I played a very bad match.But now this has been 10 times in a row.I think Roger makes me play bad. Asked about Nadal and Roger both being his opponent , he said I beat Nadal since I understood his game.But Roger was way too good.He was fast and accurate and I had no chance!
I hope for the time being speculations would be put to rest since we heard it from the best person to judge at the moment.Let the guy bask in his glory.He is already in good shape and is also going to be a father this summer.
Its good to see nice guys finish first.Its about time.

~A, Federer Fan

Confessions ...

I confess ..I am paranoid about getting married.There are no pressures but I know its gonna happen sometime next year.Am I ready ? Hell no !! Not yet.The decision I take now is gonna shape the next phase of my life.Do I wanna be with someone? Yes I do.But on my own terms.Is it possible in a marriage ? Of course not.The only term in a marriage is a life long sentence where there is no parole.I know I feel this about a marriage yet I do not believe in casual habitating with another human being either.Its contradictory.I do not want to live the utterly individualistic self sufficient life of an ambitious person , I do want the mess of people around me and yet I crave my freedom to be as I am now.Damn ! I still haven't figured out what I want.Nobody prepares you for this in life.

I was watching 'Marley & Me' today and even though the film is a lot about the dog-man bonding , all my eyes could notice was Jen Aniston going from a talented reporter to a full time mom with three kids and no career.In the end it all came down to that ?She seemed happy.Would I be ?'Scary ' is the word that popped in my mind!

I have seen all my sisters sacrificing their careers.Maybe we are not heartless people who can leave hearth and home when circumstances demand and keep their own ambitions ahead of everything.I am so close right now to something I have always dreamed of that I do not wanna leave it now.I would be giving up my dreams.Giving up everything that I have always worked for.It is so strong that I can feel it in my blood ! 

I can't make a decision.Let destiny decide.I am just hoping that  I can call myself 'destiny's child'.I know I want my cake and eat it too...Is it not possible just this once?

~A, Conflicted....

My cup of poison..

The bitter caffeine hits my senses.It is terribly black and bitter.No sugar.Leaves a strong taste in my mouth.Yet I go on.I like the fact that it is so obnoxious in taste and yet I come back for more.Not only more but i desire it.It gives me a sense of happiness.The fact that it is so distasteful and yet that ugly mug of coffee holds my attention like nothing have.I am pretty much detached to everything around me.Yet this new obsession perks me up.I am amazed something can capture so much of my attention and I am pulled more into the cobweb of black desire.In some twisted way I feel awesome that I like something which is so not sugary and syrupy.Its on your face and I can take it.I love that feeling...The dark desire

~A, feeling the pull of the dark desire...

The romance continues....

Even though born in the eighties and I grew up in the nineties, I have some old fashioned tastes that I can never outgrow and nor do I want to.I loved listening to the radio as I grew up.And I love this song of Queen..Cheers to the fact that radio still lives and my romance gets better like old wine.Some things are never meant to go out of style...

I'd sit alone and watch your light 

My only friend through teenage nights 

And everything I had to know 

I heard it on my radio 

Radio 

You gave them all those old time stars 

Through wars of worlds -- invaded by Mars 

You made 'em laugh -- you made 'em cry 

You made us feel like we could fly 

So don't become some background noise 

A backdrop for the girls and boys 

Who just don't know or just don't care 

And just complain when you're not there 

You had your time, you had the power 

You've yet to have your finest hour 

Radio 

All we hear is Radio ga ga 

Radio goo goo 

Radio ga ga 

All we hear is Radio ga ga 

Radio blah blah 

Radio what's new? 

Radio, someone still loves you! 

We watch the shows -- we watch the stars 

On videos for hours and hours 

We hardly need to use our ears 

How music changes through the years 

Let's hope you never leave old friend 

Like all good things on you we depend 

So stick around cos we might miss you 

When we grow tired of all this visual 

You had your time, you had the power 

You've yet to have your finest hour 

Radio -- Radio 

All we hear is Radio ga ga 

Radio goo goo 

Radio ga ga 

All we hear is Radio ga ga 

Radio goo goo 

Radio ga ga 

All we hear is Radio ga ga 

Radio blah blah 

Radio what's new? 

Radio, someone still loves you! 

You had your time, you had the power 

You've yet to have your finest hour 

Radio 

All we hear is Radio ga ga 

Radio goo goo 

Radio ga ga 

All we hear is Radio ga ga 

Radio blah blah 

Radio what's new? 

Radio, someone still loves you! 

Loves you 

~A, Radio buzz in my head....

Green is my new blue..

I sometimes wonder how often do we change ? How often do we crave a change in wat we desire ? How often do we like our life to pick up a different pace ? I guess quite often.Only till a year back i would blindly say blue is my favorite color.And today anything that is green catches my eye.Its only a small thing.Maybe we don't even notice that things are changing within us and around us and actually tat newness is what we are always looking for.I sometimes think that the person I was may not have been the person I am now.I don't feel like the person I was 10 yrs back.People call it growing up.I almost feel like another person , another life whose memories I share.i have changed.Some for the good and some maybe not for so much good.Life becomes complex as the thought processes multithread and take various manifestations.But one thing I have realised : my kick for life remains in the change it brings.If life had remained the same for the last ten years I don't know what I would have done.I honestly do not.Life has been so far so good.And the best part has come from my friends .The frens I had made in the lifetime of the person I feel I don't identify with anymore.But these friends make me feel that whoever she was , was at the right place , right time doing the right kind of thing.I always say I am blessed for the friends I have.This weekend I had the most amazing weekend with Praba.We did not do anything crazy , we did not go wild but the fact that we could talk like school girls sharing excitement about life and tit bits which make us girls :) was so heavenly.Maybe my life right now is not the perfect life but like I always say I am miserably happy...

As I sit contemplating...

As I sit contemplating in my spare time I realise I have managed to rub many people the wrong way recently.Blame it on stress , blame it on the quick temper gene , blame it on the wrong words at the wrong moment ; yes I have had quite a brush with quite a few people too recently.Then I read somebody's words somewhere : There is only so much time to be alive but plenty of time to be dead. So live every day like it is your last !!!!
If I were to die tomorrow I would be not free of few guilt pangs.And there would be no turning back.I might have seemed arrogant to many a people for few of the things I did.When I sit and reflected over a cup of coffee , I didn't like what I saw and what I had done.I sit up.I make up my mind.I need to make amends.I make a list of people I need to say sorry to.Its hard.I know some will perhaps not even care to reply me back.I know because I have done that in the past.But all I care and know is that convey your words without expecting immediate and certain retribution.That's the beauty of saying a genuine sorry.
I take my pen and paper.I am a person with pride.My vices are my ego , my stance in life (which I mostly thing is right and don't change much ; I can be quite egg-headed at times.. ) and many more which do not come to my mind immediately.Vices of my own device which I can't kill with a steely knife.I still have my pen and paper in hand.Good start.
I make up my mind for sure.Yes I am going to swallow that lump of pride and say Sorry.Now I know why sorry is the hardest word to say.I might be everything you think I am but I can't live with the guilt of doing something wrong and just be indifferent.I am going to say Sorry.And with every kill of the keyboard jabs , I wrote a few lines to the ones I felt I owed it to.
Always believed that few is more.And that's what I did.And trust me I haven't felt so good in a long long time.I don't expect any 'Its ok'..'its fine' in return.But I feel good from inside.Maybe even the trials of life has not yet brought down the 'humane' in me...I hope so much I am right this time..

~A, Its ok to be human, to err and say sorry...

5 feet 0 inches
I have to do the inevitable.I knew I had to get married.I could not run away from it.It is not that I run away from being with someone.Infact it would be the perfect world where you end up happily ever after (if there is any) with your soulmate.Soulmate?To explore that territory let's begin with where it all begins.Love.Oh ! The very very simple word yet the toughest to describe, the hardest to find and easy to mistake its mirage for reality.We yearn for it and we leave nothing unturned to find it.People have different perceptions about it.Some have gone ahead and said there is nothing called love.It is just a hormonal reaction ! Well even if I have nothing glorious to brag and even though I am a rational skpetic yet I can't just put love down to that.Just can't yet.Yes to carry off what I started with.I feel love (atleast for rational beings) is the search for 'the' soulmate.True we sometimes cross our path with the wrong ones mistaking them for what we are looking for and end up burning our fingers and a little more cynical , a little more skeptical and a little more (hopefully) grown up.But that urge to find one's soulmate remains.The soulmate who lets you be.The soulmate who mirrors your ideas and philosophies.The soulmate who you know you can be honest with without a thought , the soulmate who values your integrity even when you might end up being a loser in the eyes of the world.Aren't we all looking for that someone who would be on our team ?This was me about five years ago.And here I am five years later.I am weary.Was I living in some parallel world ?I never did find my soulmate and he doesn't seem anywhere near my horizon either.My parents have given me enough time .I have lived my own life on my own terms till now.Now probably I would have to give in.So comes the propositions.Questions popped.How old is she ? Is she fair ? Is she good looking ? Next comes the golden question.How tall is she ?5 feet 0 inches.And the rejections are apparent in their faces.Well all i think is Hah! Hah! Hah!Hah!I have had god knows how many years of education, topped exams ,won debates, recitations,writing contests,travelled across the globe,met people from different walks and different countries.I have faced the toughest situations with grit and determination.I have stood my ground against the wrong.I have tread the unknown treks.But here I am.All I am is a mere 5 feet nothing.You just put me in my place, din't you? But you know what my answer is : Just watch my middle finger !
~A,love being who I am

Crash , Bang , Smoke , Water ....All survive!

Twas only up six minutes in the air when the US Airways Flight 1549 (Airbus 320) made a landing in the Hudson.Yes eye witnesses are calling it more a landing than a crash.Witnesses who had no clue as to what was happening were quoted as saying that it almost looked like the pilot knew he would land it there on the Hudson.Reason for this ditch on the Hudson : Two reported bird strikes.Big planes like Airbus 320 or its successor Airbus 380 or the Boeings 747 , 727 can handle running on one engine unless and until something real fatal happens to the aircraft.The craft was on its way from LaGuardia , NY to Charlotte, NC.Given the size of the plane, it could have well glided and could have landed in the New Jersey Teterboro airport being so close in airspace distance.But this plane that should have been flying over Newark from Manhattan to Charlotte couldn't reach that point.It was going down.Going down fast !
Captain in charge : Captain Chesley B "Sully" Sullenberger.He was a fighter pilot before he joined US Airways as a commercial pilot.He was an active participant in flight saftey and had started a company for air safety as pilots are taught from day one about emergency landings as they are taught to fly.And such a co-incidence that he should be flying that plane.Everybody is lauding both the pilot and co-pilot as heroes as there was a miraculous escape for all the passengers on board.But experts say that it was a text book landing.When you need to ditch a plane, safest way to ditch is water.That is why the pilots probably chose the Hudson than the nearest airport.
Pitfalls of landing in water : A plane is designed to land on ground.The engine, wings and the landing gear become a bane in water which is otherwise the means to land on ground.The landing gear was not disengaged as it would have caused the airplane to flip and break.The fuesalage,the belly provided the buoyancy of the flight.
The pilot said : Brace for impact and the passengers knew they were going down as they could already see the smoke from the engines.
Well even though experts are calling it a text book landing with all the passengers safe what is the most laudable aspect of the incident is that there was hardly time for the pilots to decide whether to take it onto the next nearest airport(which would have been catastrophic if it landed over a populated stretch) or make a landing on water.Well the decision to land over the Hudson near the midtown area of Manhattan by clearing the Washington Bridge by around 900 ms is not only heroic and laudable but also miraculous by the success of it.
The captains saw to it that the aircraft was empty before they disembarked and another passenger was offered the captain's shirt as the captain feared that he would succumb to hypothermia as his shirt was wet.Well he z still holding onto that shirt.At the end of the flight fiasco, the safe landing had earned its place in aviation history as a study in flight safety and the pilots make us feel that miracles still happen and sometimes you don't even have to look for it.

~A,humbled by the power of life

P.S. : In a quirky indication that the plane actually had good luck, the New York State Lottery said the numbers 1549 -- the flight's designation -- are sold out through next Tuesday night on the Win 4. Wagering on numbers 1549 has been cut off because they've already reached the $5 million cap.

Off the tangent...

Before writing this piece I convinced myself that I am an Aquarian and like a true Aquarian totally capable of imagination and thoughts off the tangent.Well my story today would either merit full points for accurate deduction from Sherlock Holmes or just earn chiding for being so foolishly school girlish when i have crossed the bridge of mid-twenties.There is this cute guy in a social networking site and I have seen his profile more than once 'cause I have already let you know that he is cute.He has this school boyish charm(as all his albums are unlocked,I could get a peek once..well i did peek more than once :-D).Now like the story goes all good girls like the bad boys.And from all my previous crushes, I knew I was (me being the good girl variety) doing it again.He was totally cute,had a bad boy charm,his unlocked albums spoke about his Bohemian lifestyle and amazingly cool was that he was a musician.A real passionate one too.Looked like he had given up his career(almost I am assuming) as a techie just to play music.He played in nyc clubs and he looked totally into it.Since he had posted quite a few pictures I knew his band's name and checked him out in Google.And i did end up with more than one hit.I was gleeful.I knew I could watch a live video of him playing.And so I did !! But..but...Where was the guy ?His name was mentioned in the credits but I couldn't spot him in the 4-man band.Why?Well this is why ?'Coz the man playing the instrument did in noways looked like the cute guy in the albums.What happened? Well he had put on way tooooo much weight.He in no way resembled the guy I was crushing on.He had the cute face but looked quite heavyset now.
So i started imagining why would a band player put on so much weight?Generally they tend to be of the lean variety.Cool and smokin hot.All in one.Playing the Sherlock Holmes I was , curious me made one more stop @ his album.And then I saw a very cosy picture of him with a band of frens.The girl next to him definitely looked like a girl fren than a fren.Something I had overlooked in my rush to a crush.So I started imagining that he must have been totally in love with this girl but his passion for music drew them apart.Her parents must have stopped her (like in all Indian love stories) from being with a guy who was into music so much.He would never keep you happy..He would be away from you most of the time...blah..blahh...And so the poor musician. rocker..whatever u call him was left alone!And being so much in love with this girl it ate him away that he did not have her anymore.He might have rocked away his blues but he could not forget her.He ignored himself to ignore the pain.And he din't care anymore..And the last thing he cared was how smokin hot he looked for the world when his world was not there with him....
Trrinnnggg !
Me : Hi Mom.Wassup? You know what?The guy I was talking to you about..blahh...blahhh....
Mom : That's how you are spending your free time ? Checking out some guy in some networking site ?You think you are sixteen..blaahh ...blaahhh...never ending blahh...blahhh.....

~A,only creative imagination counts..

"SHIRTS"

Come 2009 and i thought i would jazz up my blog a little.Well its not like the idea struck me like a bolt of blue from nowhere but my cousin who visits my blog now and then gave me the idea.She said -Yo sis..Could you make your blog a little snazzy and a lot of other words from the dictionary of cool lingo which i can't exactly remember now !So that made me think of shirts.Something i love and something cool.I have always loved wearing shirts.You can always team up shirts with something as formal as a trouser suit or as casual as a tights.Button up or button down -your choice.Its sexy.I love wearing shirts myself and the on screen diva whom i find crazy cool while carrying off a shirt is Uma Thurman.Shirts should be worn with attitude and probably that's why i like Uma most.Its not about being plump or lean, you carry it off well with your signature style and its gonna definitely sit well on ya.

Pics Courtesy : NY&C , IMDB

~A,A shirt affair....

Curios..

Time wounds all heels..

Solemates..

Women who seek to be equal with men lack ambition... :-D

Love is faithless...

Happy co-incidences are a thing of the past...

Man in the moon with a cocaine spoon...Studio 54

Whatever you do, don't congratulate yourself too much, or berate yourself either. Your choices are half chance. So are everybody else's.

Life is not merely a series of meaningless accidents or coincidences.Its a tapestry of events that culminate in an exquisite, sublime plan...Serendipity,2001

Of Broadway & Hollywood...

Last Tuesday I had the most amazing time in life.I had been meaning to go watch a Broadway musical for over a year now and yet it hadn't happened.Being a student, i resort to the philosophy of simple living and high thinking (which of course I do not believe in but my purse is compelled to right now).So that was it.A year of checking out the website and seeing favorite shows play and leave ;I was still not ready to take the plunge.
But now it was that time of the year again-holiday season ! And people do crazy things during the holidays.When Nan came visiting and we decided that since she had come all the way from west coast it dignified a visit to the Broadway.And I was in no way an unwilling participant.Have heard about it from teenage years how big Broadway was and how sometimes hollywood stars did shows too.You get to see real live talent.
Having decided that yes we are finally going to a B'way screening, we were now grappling with the decision of which show ? Chicago ?No.We had already seen the movie.All My Sons ? Naah looks too serious.We wanted to come out happy like we always do in Bollywood multiplexes.And being women,we are especially suckers for sweet happy endings which makes us go Awwwwww !!
So after a lot of researching and reading tons of reviews, we settled on either Mamma Mia or 13.I had seen Mamma Mia the movie and it was quite good. 13 looked fresh , enthusiastic and peppy.A middle school musical in the lines of High School Musical.
I never knew I would do so much research for a show.On Broadway or off Broadway ? Orchestra or Mezzanine seats ? Online booking or shipped tickets ? Your credit card or mine :-) ?
But finally we decided 13 be it.And we were not disappointed.The cast was aged between 12-16 and they were talented , young,fresh and confidence literally oozed out from every dialogue , every song, every dance step.
The lead role Evan was played By Graham Phillips (whom we later clicked in our blurry camera phone).It is about a jewish boy growing up in NYC and how he has to move to a small town in Indiana coz his parents split.He has his Bar Mitzvah' coming up and he wants the cool kids from school to come over to his party.In order to make his way into the group he tries all kinds of tactics which miserbaly fail and how in the end he realises that they are not worth it.He just sticks to his real frens otherwise labelled losers in the middle school fraternity.
We loved every bit of it.It was like young adoloscents bringing sunshine to the stage that night and the show ended with a standing ovation.The stars of the evening came out and we clicked pictures of the talented babies and also realised at 13 we had absolutely no talent nor the knack for anything extraordinary.Wonder if I have any now ? Ahem..Ahem..Moving on.
As soon as we were done , somebody said Katie Holmes was performing next door and Tom Cruise had come to pick her up.We rushed.Now the thing is we women love Tom Cruise and especially Top Gun even if we were infants when it was released.We happen to fall in and outta love with him as a part of growing up.Ask any girl who grew up in the nineties.But now my part of growing up fantasy was here and I had to have a look..And my first celebrity spotting too..Went gaga over him just at his glimpse..My brush with the glitz and the glitteratti...I felt like singing "I am so lucky" with stardust raining over me but i guess that was the B'Way side-effect...
So having notched up double bonuses of B'Way and H'Wood we made our way home like two contented purring cats..My year had just ended with a big bang !

~A, still on cloud 9...